People get into romantic relationships with different expectations and different motives. Whatever the motives may be, the underlying fact is, no one wants to be lonely. We all desire to fall in love and be happy. But there is no relationship devoid of fights, misunderstanding and arguments. No relationship is perfect. Hence, the need for both partners to work hard to keep the relationship healthy. However, you can only change yourself and not your partner. Here are a few things you can do on your part to keep your relationship healthy.
Be responsible for your own happiness:
Sometimes when you have issues in your relationship, you find yourself transferring an already existing aggression, which may have come from something not even related to your relationship with your partner. Anger is a very dangerous weapon in relationships and when not controlled, can cause more damage than is bearable. Always do well not to lay blames on each other, rather take responsibility for your actions and know that your happiness is created when you make your relationship a healthy one. Instead of expecting your partner to create happiness, do it yourself, it is all within you.
Always forgive yourself and your partner:
Simply put, this is the only way to quell the burning anger you may have on yourself and your spouse. It takes a lot in patience, respect and honesty to learn how to forgive each other. Forgiveness is a decent act of humility and anyone in a relationship needs to possess this attribute. Whenever it’s introduced into a relationship, it heals all wounds and brings about happiness.
Do not expect anything from your spouse:
I’ll say it’s very difficult to not expect something from your spouse but this saying “do not expect anything from anyone because expectation hurts“ if adhered, saves you from lot of stress. Whatever you do for your spouse, do not expect that it should be reciprocated. Not having any expectations when you do a good deed for your spouse can only be possible if your good acts are prompted from the deepest part of your heart. When expectations are cut short, problems are born, for these reason, let your deeds be out of free will and not otherwise.
Be responsible for yourself:
Be ever ready to own up to whatever happens in your relationship. Always be ready when things go wrong because of you and do not try to shift blame to your spouse.
Do not try to change your spouse:
Whenever you are unhappy about a character or an attitude your spouse portrays, try to sit down and talk it over with him or her instead of trying to change them.
See your relationship as a learning experience:
As a matter of fact, I consider this point my very best! Each individual has an important information for the other to learn, and in a relationship no one is perfect, we are attracted to the partner with whom we can always learn from. A true relationship consists of two imperfect persons who are interested in learning and expanding the relationship so that it continues to improve.
Appreciate yourself and your partner:
Try to always appreciate your partner other than yourself and do not sugar-coat it. Learn to tell your partner you love him or her even in the midst of an argument, make him realize you do not want to argue with but only to talk and make things better.
Learn to apologize:
Always apologize to your partner. The five letter word “s-o-r-r-y” seem small but can save a dying relationship however damage. Sometimes, even when you are not wrong, a simple “I’m sorry” can help salvage the situation.